restless feet.

After talking with a good friend about her struggles at home along with potential colleges, I gave her a simple piece of advice. I said, "I'd encourage you to not run away from something, but to run towards something." See, I think that more often than not, we're so focused on running away from our problems that we neglect running towards the one thing that we need the most: Christ. My life--case and point.

Several of you may know this, but for those who don't, I'll give a brief overview. My mom died last April, and it wasn't even a week before my dad began a relationship with another woman. It wasn't that he cheated on my mom while she was deteriorating or anything; he and this woman had been friends since college. In fact, my parents and her and her ex-husband had all been friends since college. Because of the timing of all of this, I was naturally upset, hurt, and extremely angry. Last summer was filled with yelling, crying, and constant arguing. After my phase of rage passed, I moved into a phase of just simply being upset. My dad told me that they were planning on getting married...in the near future. I asked him to wait till the coming summer; that way, I'd be done with school and wouldn't have to worry about finishing my senior year with an awkward situation at home. My suggestion wasn't taken, however, and they got married this January. I wasn't ready to handle it just yet, so I ended up living with a good friend and her family for three months. By the end of April, I felt comfortable enough to move back into my house, so I came home on April 23rd.

Over the course of those three months, God not only changed my heart towards my family situation, but He totally transformed my view on college. Prior to this last semester, I was dead set against even looking into Covenant College. I had no reason except that it was only 45 minutes from my house. I was never someone to want to stay close to family for college, so there was now way I'd want to be less than an hour away. I had decided to go to Union University in Jackson, Tennessee back in December, and everything was pretty much set in stone for my enrollment there. Still, I didn't feel really draw to the college, and I reluctantly prayed that God would show me where He wanted me to go if it wasn't Union. Well, He placed Covenant on my heart, but I pushed it aside, convincing myself that it was just because it was normal to have doubts about your college decisions. There was no way I would go to Covenant, especially now that there was so much stuff going on with my dad getting remarried and all. But God didn't stop bugging me about it. Eventually, I gave in and talked with my dad about it. Obviously everything fell into place, because now I'm going there.

Now's when I tie everything into the first paragraph. There were other reasons why I originally decided on Union other than the fact that it was four hours away; however, the distance was very convenient for running away from my problems. I was so set on just getting away from it all, not wanting to have to deal with any of it, that I prevented myself from running towards God and what He wanted. God has really worked on my heart since January. He's shown me the importance of family and family relationships. I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't be honoring God if I was knowingly a part of a broken relationship, yet did nothing to fix it. This woman was now my stepmom; she was now a part of my family, and I wasn't capable of changing that. I knew that I needed to develop a relationship with her, but I also realized that it wouldn't happen overnight. This would take time, and I needed to allow for that time to be taken. Running away gave me no fulfillment. Not only did it accomplish absolutely nothing with my family, but it caused me to make a foolish choice of college. As soon as I threw up my hands and changed the direction I was going, I saw that in running towards God, I was actually running right through the things which had previously chased me away. I believe that sometimes God changes our circumstances, but I believe His greater intention is changing our hearts to respond to our circumstances in such a way that give Him the most glory.

Shortly before his death, Jesus prayed this for his disciples: "My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world." If we have believed by faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ, we are no longer of this world; therefore, we should not handle our problems in the same way that those who are of this world do. We should be more set on running towards our Savior than running from the tough stuff.

When Jesus' friend Lazarus had died, he went to comfort the sisters. He said to them, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?" Jesus Christ is the resurrection and the life; this means that he has conquered death, the greatest consequence of the Fall. If he has gained the victory over the greatest consequence, didn't he then also gain the victory over the other curses that sin brought upon us? Should we not then live and believe that in His arms we are in a much safer place than running away, constantly looking behind us to make sure our problems are getting farther and farther from our sight? For if we do this, we will never die. I ask you the same question that Jesus asked the sisters. Do you believe this?